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Why we don’t say everything when we say something? June 19, 2013

Posted by Shahir in As You Thinketh, Corporate.
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Old manThis might appear too obvious to you, but these are the fundamentals of communication – even before you decide to blink and with it convey a message!

We observe things around us – people, objects – and create patterns of its appearance, occurrence, size and shape, its sound and silence, to put them all together to create a set of standards of those observed objects and people, standards that will become its rule of engagements.

These standards remain in our heads, forming expectations of how these objects and people should behave, appear, or should not. They are not communicated, for, it’s assumed that it’s how it should be.

John comes to the park every morning, and sat on the bench beside the oak tree. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, everyday 6 in the morning, with a newspaper in his hand. Smith too comes to the same park and sit on the bench beside the pond full of lilies and lotus, with some flakes to feed the fish. Smith’s observation of John is someone who comes at 6 in the morning, every day, and sits on the bench beside the oak tree. When he one day moved from the  bench beside the oak tree and came and sat on the bench beside the pond, it breaks the pattern.

Smith began to think why he is coming and sitting on my bench! His bench is the one beside the oak tree. The pattern is breached. The occurrence not meeting the standard devised from the pattern of life around Smith. A conflict of interest arises as a result, causing friction, slight frustration, negative energy and therefore the feelings getting translated in the way he looks at John, the tone of voice – or the intensity of silence.

John in this case is in true sense innocent. He didn’t know the standards Smith has set for John – that the pattern he created is in conflict with his behavior today, disturbing the eco-system of Smith who has designed his mornings in the park with John in the seat beside the oak tree. The vacuum it created there, and the space that is now filled in the seat beside the pond are in conflict with his mental design of a good morning.

How often we design standards on behaviours and performance of others around us, inadvertently, from the patterns we dissect through our observations of people and objects in our surroundings, a crack in which causes us to frustrate? Often times, our expression of thoughts are just the tip of an iceberg of standards we created deep inside us of those around us,  those around us oblivious of what standards they are and therefore being non-committed to its adherence.

Relationships gets a dent when such hidden standards are operating in our minds from the patterns we observe in the shape of our own convenience that are in its true sense distant from the reality of the person and object that we are observing.

What patterns are you observing in people and objects around you with which you are creating standards that may not be healthy to demand adherence for, causing friction in your life, career etc?

 

Shahir

The Calendar ! March 31, 2013

Posted by Shahir in Life, Love and Relationship.
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Calendar ! It does speak of time. We mark days in future, to meet someone, to do something, and look forward to it. We flip the pages backward and look at a date – perhaps with a sigh or a smile. Dates and anything that’s marking dates – with inspiring quotes or without – has become an integral part of our lives, even with the integration of digital instruments off late.

But there is another sort of calendar that I look at with awe; a different sort of marking of time.

That calendar reminds me of the amazing pace of time!!

Was it a fortnight back that I was kneeling before her to tie her shoe lace, and today, she is on her knees to tie them on her own.

Was it a fortnight back that I had her between my lap and braided her hair, and today, she is standing in front of the mirror and braiding them on her own.

What appeared as yesterday is in fact memories from years ago!

The awareness of this pace of time causes an immediate reflection on time, and how they are filled!!

Perhaps there are revisions to make.

Shahir

 

Between Yesterday and Tomorrow March 13, 2013

Posted by Shahir in Corporate, Life.
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What is being optimist?

It’s your strength to cry when in pain, and yet see through the tears a ray of hope at the extreme edge of your thoughts, that this too shall pass.

It’s your strength to smile when in pain, and yet to feel through the smile the intensity of your loss and convert it into a propelling energy in the awareness, that this too shall pass.

It’s your determination to go back to the drawing board, and start it all over again even when on your collar blades the dust of debris of the disaster remains still, believing, that this too shall pass.

It is your ability to wake up every morning and to see yesterday as bygone, not to search for the bruises and scars, not to twist your ankles to feel if it aches from yesterdays fall, but to search for the joints that are strong to lift the ‘present’ and to stack it one by one on the future, with a twitch on your lips though with the taste of salt from the rolling drop, contented, that this too shall pass.

Optimism is not a big thing. It’s a small thing – a small but repeated choice of will – one that can make big difference, consistently.

It’s a choice between yesterday and tomorrow!

 

Shahir

 

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Do You Think You Know What You Think You Know? March 8, 2013

Posted by Shahir in Corporate, Inspirational Quotes, Life, Love and Relationship.
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You don’t know what you know; you don’t know what you don’t know. What you think you know is not what you really know. There are things that you’ve forgotten in time, and there are more things that you’ve ignored in time. You know you know, but you don’t know that you know so little. You know you don’t know, but you don’t know that you are knowledgeable of so much more. How do you know what you know, or what you don’t know? By knowing that you don’t know everything, and by knowing that you know something, and sometimes, by knowing you know only something, and some other times, by knowing that you know at least something. Your behaviour changes in each context. When you know you know everything, isn’t that the height of arrogance? When you know you know something, isn’t that the beginning of a good esteem? When you know you know only something, will that not open the possibilities of opening up for more – the curiosity of a child to see how the needle of a clock work? And when you know you know at least something, will that not give you a relief – that you haven’t lost everything, and opportunities are not over!!!

You know you are drawing a perfect design? What you see as a perfect design of life is factoring only the factors that you think you know; will your design not warrant revisions – perhaps extreme at that, when you begin to know what you don’t know? Your solid plan is based on the fluid dynamics of variable relationship, and therefore do you think it’s a solid plan, still? There are innumerable variables around your plan that if discovered and made to unite it creates a plan that you never designed before. You don’t know many possibilities that can be merged with the other or even submerged into the other that in magnitude of results it outweighs and dwarfs the plan that you now conceived as perfect.

Perfect is what? Perfect is your comprehension of the maximum possibilities of combining the resources that you know you have. What if then what you know is itself imperfect? You don’t know what you know. Your definition of perfect is dynamic. Your comprehension of possibilities become incomprehensible when one or more combination of resources is subtracted from your equation, for those combinations are not in your control and rather remains as a well intended wish. The expectation of resources offer no guarantee of what it is capable of producing, for your input is not necessarily the viable ingredient required of the output the resource is planning to combine their resources with. There is an equilibrium. There is a chance of not having an equilibrium. Between ‘there is’ and ‘there is not’ lies the ‘chance’ and the size of chance varies with changing time.

But now, do you think you know what you think you know?

Share with me your thoughts.

Shahir

Awareness of influencing emotions March 6, 2013

Posted by Shahir in Inspirational Quotes, Life.
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awareness

What were your waking thoughts? Those that spilled over from previous night or carried        forward from previous day, are they of empowering nature that it motivates you as a springboard to leap high and dive deep into the present, or are they lingering in the past?

If those thoughts are painful, can they be the catalyst to strengthen your resolve to drive forcefully towards achieving your goals?

If those thoughts are cheerful, can they be the reason why you add colours to the life of others around you and enrich your own life?

What is the nature of your thoughts, and how are they shaping your future?

Are you aware?

In that conscious awareness of the stirring of emotions will you find the answers and solutions that will attune your behaviour and resolutions that will produce productive results; in being blind to the existence of emotions, leaving them un-labelled and being driven by its force will cause destruction to your walls of present, cracking them through the stretch of time and pulling them down to debris.

What are the thoughts that are influencing you now, in this moment?

Are they empowering?

Can you alter them to mean different, the other side of it, and propel you to future?

 

Shahir

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